Thursday, January 11, 2007

Whack-a-german

Darwin Award Contender

Moles are annoying, conniving and vile creatures.  They hate our freedom.  But is it worth risking your life to fight the growing mole menace?  Uwe Werner felt so, and managed to eliminate himself in attempting to exterminate the moles infesting his yard.  His innovative mole electrocution system worked so well in its first test, that it killed a human.  Uwe himself. 

[Wik] No moles were harmed in the writing of this post.

[Alsø wik] My apologies to any family or friends of Uwe Werner who may by some freak of the internets have read this story.  UWE IS NOT DEAD.  IT’S OKAY.  Uwe is the police spokesgerman who announced that the retiree is dead.  HE IS NOT DEAD HIMSELF.  The name of the retiree has not, to my knowledge, been released.  Which is frustrating, because I was imagining an old guy, puttering around the lawn, about to plug in his super-turbo-mole-zapper2000; his wife calls out, “UUUweee noooooo!” and then he goes all lightning and special effects.  Without the name, my mental picture is less satisfying. 


Posted by Buckethead on 01/11/07 at 11:48 PM
Darwin Award Contender • Permalink