POINT DUME—DAY

It is a high, wind-swept bluff.  Walter and the Dude walk
towards the lip of the bluff.  Parked in the background is
one lonely car, Walter’s.

Walter is carrying a bright red coffee can with a blue plastic
lid.  When they reach the edge the two men stand awkwardly
for a beat.  Finally:

WALTER
I’ll say a few words.

The Dude clasps his hands in front of him.  Walter clears
his throat.

WALTER
Donny was a good bowler, and a good
man.  He was. . . He was one of us. 
He was a man who loved the outdoors,
and bowling, and as a surfer explored
the beaches of southern California
from Redondo to Calabassos.  And he
was an avid bowler.  And a good
friend.  He died--he died as so many
of his generation, before his time. 
In your wisdom you took him, Lord. 
As you took so many bright flowering
young men, at Khe San and Lan Doc
and Hill 364.  These young men gave
their lives.  And Donny too.  Donny
who. . . who loved bowling.

Walter clears his throat.

WALTER
And so, Theodore--Donald--Karabotsos,
in accordance with what we think
your dying wishes might well have
been, we commit your mortal remains
to the bosom of.

Walter is peeling the plastic lid off the coffee can.

WALTER
the Pacific Ocean, which you loved
so well.

AS HE SHAKES OUT THE ASHES:

WALTER
Goodnight, sweet prince.

The wind has blown all of the ashes into the Dude, standing
just to the side of and behind Walter. The Dude stands,
frozen. Finished eulogizing, Walter looks back.

WALTER
Shit, I’m sorry Dude.

He starts brushing off the Dude with his hands.

WALTER
Goddamn wind.

Heretofore motionless, the Dude finally explodes, slapping
Walter’s hands away.

DUDE
Goddamnit Walter!  You fucking
asshole!

WALTER
Dude!  Dude, I’m sorry!

The Dude is near tears.

DUDE
You make everything a fucking
travesty!

WALTER
Dude, I’m--it was an accident!

The Dude gives Walter a furious shove.

DUDE
What about that shit about Vietnam!

WALTER
Dude, I’m sorry--

DUDE
What the fuck does Vietnam have to
do with anything!  What the fuck
were you talking about?!

Walter for the first time is genuinely distressed, almost
lost.

WALTER
Shit Dude, I’m sorry--

DUDE
You’re a fuck, Walter!

He gives Walter a weaker shove.  Walter seems dazed, then
wraps his arms around the Dude.

WALTER
Awww, fuck it Dude.  Let’s go bowling.