Dan Savage sez: “Confidential to everybody: ‘Pearl necklace’ is out. ‘Cheney’ is in. Pass it on.”

And then Ace gives us “Brokeback Quail Hunt,” a film script which really is worth a thorough read.

excerpt:

SCENE: After parting ways for some time, Dick and Henry depart from their wives to meet again in a quail marsh.

The friends shake hands, happy to see each other again. Then they hug, manfully, but passionately.

Then Dick takes out a shotgun and shoots Henry in the hip.

Dick and Henry both collapse into the marsh grass. Dick, because he’s spent from the overpowering emotion; Henry, because his hip is badly wounded and he’s lost 90% of the blood-flow to his right leg.

HENRY: Dick… do you think it’s possible that one day we’ll come out here, be “special friends” together, with no cares and no worries… and you won’t shoot me with your shotgun?

DICK: Maybe. One day. When the world is ready to understand this thing of ours.

HENRY: When do you think that will be, Dick?

DICK: Ever see Blade Runner?

HENRY: Yeah.

DICK: Sometime after that.

HENRY: I can’t wait.

Henry passes out from shock. Dick cradles his head.

One of our sitting Senators’ names is now synonymous with a gross admixture of bodily fluids deriving from anal intercourse, and our Vice President’s name is on its way to becoming associated with, erm… shooting… someone in the face. Dan Savage is a bad, bad, bad, bad man.