Holy Shit!

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Who says the London housing market’s not reasonable?

Holy Shit!

Certainly not the tenants of this fine abode:

image

For 20p/night, this too can be yours.

(via Z, my Beirut correspondent)


Posted by Patton on 05/08/07 at 09:36 AM
Holy Shit!Permalink

Friday, May 04, 2007

Proof, as if any were required

Holy Shit!Just So You Know

...that Barack Obama was correct when he singled out the most important problem that we, the people of the United States of America, need to deal with:

“The biggest enemy I think we have in this whole process (and why I’m so glad to see a lot of young people here, young in spirit if not young in age)--the reason I think i’ts [sic] so important, is because one of the enemies we have to fight--it’s not just terrorists, it’s not just Hezbollah, it’s not just Hamas--it’s also cynicism,” Barack Obama told a reception after the AIPAC [American Israel Public Affairs Committee] policy conference last night.

Mr. Obama, I’d like to introduce you, via the May 2, 2007 Star-Ledger, to former NJ Governor Jim McGreevey:

Former Gov. James E. McGreevey has started the process to become a priest in his newly adopted Episcopal faith and has been accepted into a three-year seminary program starting this fall.

[Wik] As an added bonus, one of the very few commenters on that story who actually seemed to be supportive of McGreevey (or McCreepy, as he was referred to a time or two) was able to inject into the conversation some of that delicious truthiness we all crave:

Reader11722 says…

McGreevey has a right to become whatever he wants. We should not censor his free expressions. After all, censorship is becoming America’s favorite past-time. The US gov’t (and their corporate friends), already detain protesters, ban books like “America Deceived” from Amazon and Wikipedia, shut down Imus and fire 21-year tenured, BYU physics professor Steven Jones because he proved explosives, thermite in particular, took down the WTC buildings. Free Speech forever (even for McGreevey).
Last link (before Google Books caves to pressure and drops the title):
America Deceived (book)

Posted on 05/02/07 at 2:22PM

Of course, we live in a fascist dictatorship, which is why “Reader11722” was immediately collected and shipped off to a re-education facility. Free speech forever, indeed!  Even for, nay, especially for, utter dipshits.


Posted by Patton on 05/04/07 at 11:44 PM
Holy Shit!Just So You KnowPermalink

Some autocrats never learn

Filthy LucreHoly Shit!Just So You Know

It seems that Hugo Chávez could take a lesson on the definition of insanity from Ben Franklin.  In his defense, it’s not that Chávez is repeatedly trying something that’s previously failed for him, just something that’s failed every other time a state actor has attempted to put it into place. Perhaps it’s just insanity by proxy, then.

Of course, I’m talking about his aggressive advancement of the long-vauntedBolivarian Revolution“.  From the Mother Jones article linked left:

To his increasingly frustrated political opponents in Venezuela, Chavez, a former army colonel, is a leftist demagogue who stirred up a wave of class and racial resentments and rode it to the presidency, and who, in office, has dealt himself new powers at every chance, on his way to becoming an out-and-out caudillo. And to a certain school of international opinion, exemplified by The Economist magazine, Chavez is an wacky utopian who sooner or later will run the Venezuelan economy into the ground.

That introductory paragraph leads into an October 2005 interview with Richard Gott, a former correspondent for the London Guardian who seems knowledgeable and sympathetic to the fiery populism that sometimes seems the prime illuminating factor for Latin American progressive governments. The interview was done in support of his then-updated book, “Hugo Chavez and the Bolivarian Revolution”:

...the first account in English to place Chavez in historical and intellectual perspective. In Gott’s sympathetic account, Chavez is a magnetic personality of the Clintonian type, “a genuinely original figure in Latin America,” a radical left-wing nationalist, to be sure, but a pragmatic improviser, and certainly no dogmatic socialist.

Among his statements during the interview, you’d find:

Okay, it’s true that Chavez, for the first time this year, has used the word “socialism"—he talks about a “21st Century Socialism"—but he’s given absolutely no indication that he wants to emulate Soviet socialism, Cuban socialism, or indeed the sort of state capitalism that existed in Europe for much of the late 20th century.
{...}
I think he [Chávez] still recognizes the significance of the ideas of Bolivar. He’s more interested in culture than in economics. All leftist revolutions in the past have been based on an economic restructuring of society.

Whoops.  Looks like Mr. Gott spoke too soon.  Because the wacky utopian, contrary to Gott’s expectations, seems to have moved even farther left, embracing something that looks a lot like Soviet/Cuban socialism, and has recently chosen to dispense with even the veneer of normal government.


Posted by Patton on 05/04/07 at 01:31 AM
Filthy LucreHoly Shit!Just So You KnowPermalink

Friday, April 27, 2007

Buckethead, Biblical Authority

Holy Shit!

It’s Friday Funtime Quizzery time.  Over at Naked Villainy, we find a biblical quiz.  I scared the Bejesus out of myself by getting a 100%, proving that despite two and half decades without cracking open the bible, my Lutheran Confirmation classes were ruthlessly effective.  How well can you do, Heathen?

You know the Bible 100%!
 

Wow!  You are awesome!  You are a true Biblical scholar, not just a hearer but a personal reader!  The books, the characters, the events, the verses - you know it all!  You are fantastic! 

Ultimate Bible Quiz
Create MySpace Quizzes


Posted by Buckethead on 04/27/07 at 04:36 PM
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Wednesday, April 25, 2007

C or Bust!

Holy Shit!That Buck Rogers Stuff

The more alert of our mostly sessile readership may have noted that astronomers have detected a new extrasolar planet.  We’ve discovered hundreds of extrasolar planets, so why is this one so damned special?  Well, let me tell you.  It’s earthlike.  It’s close.  And it’s in the habitable zone of its star.

Roadtrip!

Well, close in astronomical terms, and for some odd values of “earthlike.” The new planet, Gliese 581c, is about half again as big, and five times as massive as Earth.  The bigdomes are guessing that this would result in a surface gravity somewheres around twice that of Earth.  Which would kill any fat, tall people on a colonization mission.  It’d be worse than Oregon Trail.  For more details on what life might be like on this planet, visit here, here, here, or here.  And get in line behind this guy for tickets:

image

What might be most significant about this discovery is its implications for the Drake Equation – something we talked about in great depth just a little while ago.  Pretty much as soon as we fired up that fancy new telescope, we discover an earthlike world, right on our doorstep.  That has to be indicative of how common planets like ours are in the galaxy. 

As we learn more about the big universe out there, more of the numbers in the Drake equation are looking to be large.  The Drake eqation can be divided into physical, life, and civilization factors.  All of the physical factors are now almost certain to be large across the galaxy, so there’s no way to minimize your estimates of the number of ETs by saying that there aren’t going to be abodes for life as we know it.  (Of course, they may be many other places amenable to life as we don’t know it.)

As for life, there are two ways that we could get a firmer grasp on how to judge those numbers, and both are within, nearly, our grasp.  Any evidence of life in our solar system would be a strong, but not definitive, clue that life is common in the galaxy.  Europa and Mars are the prime candidates there.  More research along the lines we are pursuing now may give us some answers.  The other way is to increase our capacity to gain information on extrasolar planets, which we are also pursuing.  If we get to the point where we can image these planets, it is certainly possible that we could detect chlorophyll or other biological evidence in their reflected light.  Finding that would be strong evidence that life exists outside our solar system, and that it could be common as well.

That would mean that two thirds of the Drake Equation’s constituent elements would be heavily weighted toward high numbers.  And that the chance of ET’s would be correspondingly higher as well.

[Wik] The super nifty star map has not yet been updated to include our new vacation destination.  However, you can look at it anyway by going to the to the scrolly thing right on the left side of the window, and scroll down about halfway, looking for “Gl 581.” When you find it, click it, and you’ll see the Gl 581 circled on the star map.  Click on it, or in the window on the right to see the solar system, sadly absent little c.  On the star map, if you click on the right arrow, and then the back arrow, you’ll be in our sector.  Neato!


Posted by Buckethead on 04/25/07 at 05:47 PM
Holy Shit!That Buck Rogers StuffPermalink

Friday, April 20, 2007

Some records just beg to be broken

Holy Shit!Just So You Know

And some should be allowed to stand unchallenged.

Apropos this earlier item, I’d caution the participants to not be like this woman:

Woman registers a .47 on breath tester

Thu Apr 19, 1:41 PM ET (AP)

REDMOND, Wash. - A woman arrested following two car crashes last week registered a .47 blood-alcohol content on a breath test — nearly six times the legal intoxication threshold and possibly a state record.
Deana F. Jarrett, 54, was taken to Evergreen Hospital as a precaution following her arrest April 11, the Washington State Patrol said Wednesday. No one was injured in the accidents.

Jarrett blew the .47 on a portable breath tester after she collided with two other vehicles in quick succession, the patrol said. A check of all 356,000 breath tests administered since 1998 in Washington turned up only 35 above .40 — and none of those was higher than .45.

The legal intoxication threshold in Washington is .08.

Jarrett did not appear to have a listed phone number, and it was not clear if she had obtained a lawyer.

(excerpted in its short entirety, to avoid the corrosive effects of future link-rot)

It rather reminds me of a colleague from years ago, who once proudly held the “women’s record” for blood alcohol level in Whitehall, OH, at .20%.  I remember having read somewhere that .30% was lethal, but I’m not going to go and Google it, since, per the above, it must not be true.


Posted by Patton on 04/20/07 at 09:28 AM
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Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Me? I’d prefer they just focus on getting out of Chapter 11

Filthy LucreHoly Shit!It'll Be a Cold Day in Hell

Chapter 11 proceedings seem to focus the corporate mind. Not always on anything that matters to business, however.  Witness, below, excerpted from an email message I got from Delta Airlines today:

In a partnership with The Conservation Fund, we are the first U.S. airline to implement a voluntary carbon offset program — and we’d love to have you “onboard.”

It’s simple. Beginning June 1, 2007, you will be able to add a small donation to fund the planting of trees in sustainable managed forests around the globe when you book your ticket at delta.com. These trees will help off-set carbon emissions by absorbing carbon dioxide from the atmosphere and converting it to oxygen as part of their natural processes.

We’ll disburse 100 percent of your donation to “The Conservation Fund program” to plant trees and to support the organization’s education and outreach efforts. Additionally, we’ll make a donation to The Conservation Fund for every customer flying on a Delta mainline jet worldwide on Earth Day (April 22).

It’s just part of our Force for Global Good initiative that strives to benefit the world we fly everyday. So go ahead and take a flight, and join us in uniting our customers and employees in support of environmental stewardship.

Note: this, from the company with the well-meaning customer service people who called to reschedule a flight I’ve got on tap for next week because their operations staff had changed things, leaving me a massive 7 minute connection time in Atlanta.  Whoops.  But at least they called.

Anyhow, a couple things occur to me right off the bat.

If they’d paid as much attention to their stockholders as they pretend to pay to the environment, their (former) stockholders wouldn’t need to be such heavy users of Preparation H.  Sure, the stock’s at $0.16/share as I write this, but it’s likely overvalued. Bankruptcy has a way of doing that.

Secondly, as I read that kind offer of theirs to join the “Force for Global Good”, it sure looks like they’re trying hard to do it with my money, and that it’s not really them (other than on Earth Day™!) that will be doing the giving.  If they want to give their own corporate money to a fool’s boondoggle like carbon offsets, I’m fine with that. I’m not one of their stockholders, and am, in fact, a relatively steady customer of theirs. They’ve already proven, over the years, a callous disregard for the interests of their owners, and those owners are probably beyond surprise at this point. The customers, like me, being a bit more flexible in our ability to avoid having donations milched on our behalf, will see this as the useless public relations gum flapping that it is.

[Wik] What good is corporate gum flapping without a press release?


Posted by Patton on 04/18/07 at 10:55 PM
Filthy LucreHoly Shit!It'll Be a Cold Day in HellPermalink

The aliens are coming, hooray, hooray

Holy Shit!That Buck Rogers StuffWar

The blessed amazon fairy delivered another load of printed goodness at my doorstep.  Typically, the amazon fairy brings me science fiction that is more or less throw-away, enjoyable to read but whose thinks pass in and then out of my brain leaving little lasting impression.  Or history tracts that expand or deepen my knowledge of the past without notably changing my opinions of it.  But this last deposit was a little different.

The book in the plain brown wrapper was An Introduction to Planetary Defense, A Study of Modern Warfare Applied to Extra-Terrestrial Invasion.” The careful and attentive reader of this website will quickly discern why this title got onto my wishlist.  Of the four writers, I had only heard of the lead author, Travis S. Taylor, who had written a few science fiction novels for Baen Books.  From the bios in those works, I knew that Dr. Taylor was a bit of a big brain, working for NASA and various defense department projects, including the Breakthrough Propulsion Physics program at NASA before its untimely demise.  The name of the book and that last fact was enough for me to shell out the $35.

Was it worth it?  On balance, I think definitely yes.  There are problems with the book.  Let’s get them out of the way first.  The book is very poorly edited.  There are typos, bad grammar, and poorly formed sentences throughout.  That is irritating and distracts from the message the book is trying to get across.  The book is poorly balanced, by which I mean that certain points will be attacked in great detail, and the next bit, seemingly of equal importance, will be glossed over.  This creates a problem when the authors refer to something that was not adequately discussed further on, and my reaction is a resounding, “huh? Where’d that come from?” That’s the technical side.

On the idea side, I have far fewer problems, and where I do, it’s wishing that the authors had explored a topic a little more, or discussed something they didn’t.  More on that (oh, much more.  I’m going to go den Beste on their ass) later.  Despite the flaws that are, I imagine, the result of what looks like self-publishing, this book is chock full of interesting, thought-provoking meaty stuff. 

Why do I think so?  Let me count the ways…

In thinking about aliens, two things have always bothered me, and I hoped that An Introduction would address them.  The first of these problems is Fermi’s paradox, and the second is the remarkable optimism of SETI researchers.  I was happy to see that this book addressed both of them, and in spades.


Posted by Buckethead on 04/18/07 at 02:41 AM
Holy Shit!That Buck Rogers StuffWarPermalink

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

They’re Taking Our Jobs!

Holy Shit!Lead Pipe CrueltyUnmitigated Gall

First it was the Irish, with their mining and their farming. Then it was the Slavs, those factory-dwelling scum. Then it was the Latinos with their ambition and willingness to spread mulch and cook your steak frites for little pay. Then it was the Indonesians with their endless garment factories. Then it was the Indians, who have apparently limitless capacity to take shit from irate helpline callers while producing flawless C++ code. And now it’s the damn Chinese, taking the job of insane mass murderer away from the white, Christian American males to whom it is their birthright.

No. Seriously. Check this amazing shit out! Media whore Debbie Schlussel is an early frontrunner in the contest to say the least appropriate, most reprehensible thing possible about yesterday’s shootings at Virginia Tech, and she’s come up with a doozy. Wow!

So, the perpetrator of the Virginia Tech massacre is a Chinese national here on a student visa. And, today, this alien did “the job that Americans just won’t do.”

If you really want to be put off your lunch, kite over to her site and check out all the people who somehow agree that yesterday’s tragedy is somehow an argument for tighter immigration laws (or evidence of a Great Yellow Conspiracy of unexplained provenance or purpose). Also go to her site if you somehow think I’m taking her out of context or misrepresenting the thrust of her argument. ‘Cos I ain’t.

Hat tip to Outside the Beltway

[Wik]... and check up the to this post, which I found via qando. Just awesome!

**** UPDATE #3, 04/17/07: The shooter has now been identified as a South Korean national. ****

**** UPDATE #2: The shooter has now been identified as a Chinese national here on a student visa. Lovely. Yet another reason to stop letting in so many foreign students. ****

**** UPDATE: Shootings appear professional, says expert; VTU Alum on school’s “Asian” Population; 2nd Amenment-Free Campus/VTU lobbied against students having guns on campus for personal protection ****

Here’s what we know about the murderer of at least 32 students and maimer of at least 28 more at Virginia Tech, today:

* The murderer has been identified by law enforcement and media reports as “a young Asian male.”

* The Virginia Tech campus has a very large Muslim community, many of which are from Pakistan (per terrorism investigator Bill Warner).

* Pakis are considered “Asian.”

* There were 2 attacks at least half a mile apart.

* There have been at least two bomb threats to this campus in the last two weeks.

And dig her rebuttals to the comments:

Posted by: Old Atlantic [TypeKey Profile Page] at April 16, 2007 04:48 PM

Pakis are considered “Asian.”

I believe the correct term is “Pakistani”.

YOUR BELIEF SYSTEM IS FLAWED. EITHER TERM IS CORRECT. WHAT IS THIS--THE IMUS THOUGHT POLICE?
DEBBIE SCHLUSSEL


Posted by Johno on 04/17/07 at 11:22 AM
Holy Shit!Lead Pipe CrueltyUnmitigated GallPermalink

Monday, April 16, 2007

I bet you wish you hadn’t said that

Holy Shit!Lead Pipe Cruelty

Twenty one people have been killed and at least another 21 injured at Virginia Tech.  Details are scant, but apparently the shootings took place at two separate locations on the campus - in a residence hall and in an engineering building.  I recognize that this is a minor note amidst a lot of much greater suffering, but reading the coverage available so far I imagine that Virginia Tech spokesman Larry Hincker is going to feel like a complete shit for saying this probably as the shootings were happening:

A bill that would have given college students and employees the right to carry handguns on campus died with nary a shot being fired in the General Assembly.

House Bill 1572 didn’t get through the House Committee on Militia, Police and Public Safety. It died Monday in the subcommittee stage, the first of several hurdles bills must overcome before becoming laws.

The bill was proposed by Del. Todd Gilbert, R-Shenandoah County, on behalf of the Virginia Citizens Defense League. Gilbert was unavailable Monday and spokesman Gary Frink would not comment on the bill’s defeat other than to say the issue was dead for this General Assembly session.

Virginia Tech spokesman Larry Hincker was happy to hear the bill was defeated. “I’m sure the university community is appreciative of the General Assembly’s actions because this will help parents, students, faculty and visitors feel safe on our campus.”

[Wik] Update: Tuesday - In the comments, the Astronomicon informs us that the bill mentioned above died in committee back at the end of January, not yesterday as I had mistakenly assumed from the dateline on the article I linked.  Thanks for the correction.  Astro has a informative post about the bill, and goes into more detail than the article I found.  It can be read here.


Posted by Buckethead on 04/16/07 at 02:38 PM
Holy Shit!Lead Pipe CrueltyPermalink

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Manatee threat growing in Florida

Holy Shit!

It seems that the first annual Ministry Manatee Hunt and Barbecue, while a roaring success, was not quite roaringly successful enough.  It seems that the total number of Manatees is on the rise, and some are even talking of removing the dread sea cow from the endangered list.  Back in ‘91, the manatee census revealed that there were 1261 of the beasties skulking about in the waters of Florida.  The most recent census tallies 2,812 of the critters.  Which means that despite killing over 400 and donating the meat to soup kitchens and homeless shelters, we still have not been able to even reduce, let alone eliminate, the population of manatees.  It seems that we will have to redouble our efforts, and institute a semi-annual Ministry Manatee Hunt and Barbecue.

[Wik] We discovered that a dry rub barbecue works best with the well marbled manatee steaks.  Add a nice hefeweizen, some corn on the cob, and you’re in heaven.

[Alsø wik] For GeekLethal, a pic of the perfect Manatee huntin’ rifle, the Barrett M82:

image

[Alsø alsø wik] For everyone else, this charming story about the M82.


Posted by Buckethead on 04/10/07 at 08:42 PM
Holy Shit!Permalink

Aggressive pursuits, legal and otherwise

Holy Shit!Partisan Politics

If you happened to pick up a copy of today’s issue of USA Today, you could find a story entitled ”Katrina claims stagger corps“. You could find the same thing if, as happened to me, you saw it on a newswire, and thus didn’t have to trouble yourself with purchasing the paper, with its sometimes-difficult-to-stomach format and voice. (n.b. - not it’s opinion voice, but the clipped, short attention span voice they seem to choose for their stories, often resulting in news that, while it’s neither more nor less accurate than anywhere else, didn’t get the name “McNews” for nothing)

The story’s key points are a bit breathtaking - New Orleans is seeking $77 billion in restitution and Louisiana’s attorney general wants $200 billion.

New Orleans and Louisiana, swamped when the city’s storm protections failed during Hurricane Katrina, demand the federal government pay a damage bill that is more than double the entire cost of the massive Gulf Coast rebuilding effort.

So many claims have been filed against the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers that the agency needs at least another month even to tally the floor-to-ceiling stacks, spokesman Vic Harris says.

{...}

Those two alone are more than double the $110 billion Congress approved for Florida and the Gulf Coast after Katrina and two other hurricanes struck in 2005.

(ellipsis mine) Ouch.

Posted by Patton on 04/10/07 at 02:33 AM
Holy Shit!Partisan PoliticsPermalink

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

I was a little less motivated in High School

Holy Shit!

From Bruce Schneier’s on Security Blog, a link to a fascinating story of a young British fraud prodigy, in two parts.


Posted by Buckethead on 04/04/07 at 04:14 PM
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Saturday, March 31, 2007

Lois would like to welcome her new robot overlord

Holy Shit!

Holy Latent Homosexuality Batman!  I forget where I got this.  Maybe Rocket Jones.  Maybe Llama Butchers.  Maybe somebody else altogether.  But regardless, it is awe inspiring.

Go see Joker’s Boner, and many other horrifying comics.


Posted by Buckethead on 03/31/07 at 11:42 AM
Holy Shit!Permalink

Since we can’t really reopen the book on Minnesota…

EntertainmentHoly Shit!Lead Pipe Cruelty

Minnesota has already had its turn in the barrel, and it’s far enough in the past (Aug 2006) that simply appending this item to it would consign the appendage to obscurity, and spare the Gopher State the additional ridicule that it so richly deserves.

So, Minnesota gets to be our first multi-part state smackdown recipient, all for a single news story from today:

Minn. lawmaker lobbies for Tilt-A-Whirl

Fri Mar 30, 5:38 AM ET

ST. PAUL - State Rep. Patti Fritz, DFL-Faribault, has introduced a bill designating the Tilt-A-Whirl the official amusement ride in Minnesota.

Fritz said she’s taking up the cause of 52 kindergarten students from her district who say it deserves special attention because it was invented in their town.

“I represent children too,” Fritz said, adding, “Minnesotans like to have fun, and it’s a fun thing to do.”

The Tilt-A-Whirl is a platform-type ride consisting of seven freely spinning cars holding up to four riders apiece.

Herbert Sellner invented it in 1926 and the first one debuted at the Minnesota State Fair a year later. Sellner Manufacturing in Faribault still makes it.

Minnesota already has a state muffin (blueberry), a state gemstone (the Lake Superior agate), a state drink (milk), a state butterfly (monarch) and seven other official symbols.

Sorry - it’s short, so I just included it all. Well, that, plus it’s a Yahoo story, so it’ll eventually disappear from the web on its own if I don’t snatch it. Can’t have the Ministry archives filled with dead links, now can we? Of course, the story itself is a bit short on important details, such as surprise vomiting attacks suffered by tilt-a-whirlers and indirectly by those to their left and right.

Another thought occurs to me, now that I’ve gone to all the trouble to lift that entire news story - we could just start another semi-regular series here at the Ministry, one devoted to ridiculing individual legislators also richly in need of such ridicule.  The potential downside, of course, is that given the size of the list of valid editorial targets, we’re woefully understaffed for such an enterprise.


Posted by Patton on 03/31/07 at 02:03 AM
EntertainmentHoly Shit!Lead Pipe CrueltyPermalink
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